Fourteen! That’s how many Christmas cards I have finished and mailed approximately by today. Seems I’m ahead compared to a couple ladies I ran into at Starbucks.
I know my habit of sending humorous (some “Christians” would say inappropriate) Christmas cards is rather archaic given how many can just send less personal, vapid electronic messages or even lazy posts through FaceBook and a mass SMS burst through the address book. I continue because I like it. The more modern or convenient means have their merits, they’re not me. Firstly, I love the rather funny cards offered through Nobleworks. Secondly, I always strive to write a brief, personal, upbeat letter to the primary recipient. I could never bring myself to writing an annual newsletter…my site is closer to this but it does offer interaction! Hint.
This year is a major anniversary regarding my personal tradition, something a friend once called an outward expression of my Hallmark gene, because I got more consistent in 1995. When I was bit by the pen-pal bug in 1982 I managed to mail a card to the main people I corresponded with. I practically stopped once I started university which is pretty normal for most, this doesn’t mean I endorse my past laziness. After graduation, money was rather tight…and it remained this way until about 1995. Now I could be full of crap, especially if the friends I have recall the cards I gave from 1990-94. They probably can, I think the difference would be, I didn’t buy the cards in bulk, they may have been rather blah over funny and I wasn’t very stoked.
The year 1995 is the watershed period due to my economic situation being vastly better. Sure was a mere temp at Apple but I was doing well enough to buy some gifts to give and paying the essential bills on my apartment wasn’t weekly crisis any longer. So during my walk home from University Towers on a Saturday, I made a diversion into a gift shop next to Amy’s Ice Cream on Guadalupe (both are long gone at this strip mall). On the store’s shelves was this card which inspired my annual tradition. It also remains the record holder for being brought up the most. Click on them to see their blasphemy at a higher resolution!
It is pretty funny and accurate.
Of course, some choices ran afoul with those showed their religiosity, namely my mother who has been spared since 2003. My response has always been, you know the reason behind the holiday is fiction right? Christianity moved the date to push out the Pagans’ solstice celebration because the few events the Romans can corroborate, namely the census ordered by Emperor Augustus, happened in the Spring. Eventually, I just found something “less offensive” yet stinging/memorable to them, if I bothered again.
Finding good, unique cards remained a difficult process. Stores selling what I liked around Austin became an annual quest. You usually had to pounce on this little joint next Waterloo Records by Halloween; they had this line of movie parodies I’ve never found again. Hard to believe I scored another great batch at Urban Outfitters. Sadly these little places have evaporated as Austin’s Bohemian pockets are Dallasified or Houstonized. The Internet proved to the villain and the hero for me. The company responsible for 1995’s gem printed their Web site on the back, Nobleworkscards.com. I highly recommend them. They also sell cards for all audiences. I just don’t recommend them to homophobes.
My ex-shrink found this hilarious. I’m sure it made others cringe.
Today’s strategy usually involves me buying about three designs of a dozen each in the Summer. Noble Works does print-to-order stuff and includes free shipping. Besides, there’s no serious demand in June or July like right now, I bet their site and phones are going nuts with those who don’t plan ahead. Best of all, these guys print the cards in America, not China, the other place publishers go for cheap materials and labor much to my dismay with Paizo. Canada is also acceptable. I can’t think of any European nation which is skilled at physical printing.
I was in a Seventies and Politically Incorrect vibe with this one. It went over better than I expected.
Should you receive a card from me. Thanks for reading it! I’m confident you at least glanced the interior I wrote on. These cards require a Sharpie®, my ballpoint pens can’t get any traction. Do I expect one back? It would be nice. If you can’t/won’t, at least buy a few from Noble Works. They do other holidays and life events.