It’s a huge relief to find good things at Hot Topic amongst all the usual crap they sell to the keep the lights on: Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber, Carrie Underwood (really), terrible Nu-Metal/Emo acts whose names are a sentence long, numerous Mall Goth supplies and Insane Clown Posse products (probably for the irony). I shouldn’t be surprised since there was a joke from an episode of Drawn Together that nailed the dilemma on the head, “Do you really think we could stay in business selling Hello Kitty backpacks and Invader Zim steering-wheel covers?”
Fortunately, there are always sprouts of good taste amongst the weeds of awfulness in HT’s band-shirt selection: Ting Tings, Deathcab for Cutie, Weezer and Bad Religion. Plenty of “retro” via The Clash, Beatles, Queen (I scored News of the World), Metallica, AC/DC, Johnny Cash, Nirvana, Morrissey, Hendrix, so on. But when I saw Elvis dressed up as a TV Seventies detective, I had to own this! Actually, if you take away the badge, he resembles a stereotypical Mafia figure. Better yet, I got it on sale because it was classified as music apparel.
Now I’m in a scramble to hunt down the music of Pinkard & Bowden, Country music’s attempt at having its own Weird Al. Why? Back when I was in college, WMUR had a copy of their album PG-13. Nobody wanted it…it was Country! eww! (Dwight and Lyle used to get an equally chilly reception too.) I looked over the song titles, noticed how they stated one was set to “Islands in the Stream,” they called it “Music Industry.” However, the winner on it is “Elvis was a Narc.”
Here’s a little sample of the chorus I have branded in my brain:
Elvis was a Narc
Wearing rhinestones after dark.
Fighting crime from his limousine.
He knew every pill he’d eat.
Would be one less on the street.
Elvis took those drugs for you and me.
Cool, for once Google came up with a winner. These guys still offer their stuff online from the pseudo retirement and I won’t have to settle with the live record on iTunes!