Nelson & Steve go to White Castle sans Neil Patrick Harris as comic relief
The flight was “uneventful,” since it wasn’t on the news and I lived to write about it two weeks later. Things were off to a rough start as the plane rocked in the rain for the first 40 minutes. The rational part of me knew to relax, the crew wouldn’t fly if the odds were against us. When the sun rose, the clouds and rain evaporated, the flight stabilized and I got to enjoy my comp cranberry juice. Any time I gained was lost by Midway Airport. My guess? Mayor Emmanuel had his staff scan my luggage for shakedown money.
Nelson and Nicolas picked me up once I had my suitcase which came with a lovely “inspection” by the Department of Der Fatherland Security. See the picture below. What a bunch of stupid pricks! If I were an al-Qeda operative, would I put some superficial f*&#in’ lock on my luggage? The darned thing is present to keep the two zippers held together, thus keeping the bag closed. Nothing was stolen, namely the bottle of Rudy’s BBQ sauce I brought as a minor gift.
No one in TSA had a hairpin? I think they get off breaking locks.
Next was Nelson’s house to drop off my luggage. He gave me the fifty-cent tour (it’s an expression, I’m sure it would be worth more). I met the other three children: Ariana, Lucas and Marcus along with Nelson’s spouse of the last 17 years, Tammy. Oh, Nelson’s dad was around for his first visit to the Midwest in over a decade like me. The current dog Comet proved to be manageable, I have an aversion to them. One gets such an issue after being bitten in the ass by a canine.
Nelson humored me with a quick trip to White Castle, I hadn’t eaten since 2-3 AM in Austin, I was snacking on Cheetos while packing. The lady taking my order must’ve been having an awful day, she was surprised with my patience and courtesy. I kidded her by offering to be a jerk if she thought it would help. Whiteys, Sliders, Gut Bombs, etc. remain awesome! I will never let myself be deprived of these unique, little burgers for a decade again.
All those nasty calories soon induced the inevitable carb coma (see below) I often experience when I travel; I hate flying so I never sleep the evening before the out-going trip, just too nervous. Marcus wanted to watch Cars 2, this helped. Now many friends said I was being unfairly critical of a movie I hadn’t seen. Well, I suffered through all the Larry the Cable Guy I could and I have earned the right to say Cars 2 is the turd in the Pixar caviar.
Sleeping off eight White Castles is a better way to survive a showing of Cars 2, the alternative is poking your eyes out with sharp objects.
Evening rolled in, it happens much earlier in the Midwest than I recalled (4:30-5 PM), and Nelson had great news. Our mutual friend Phil was going to drive down from the other side of Chicago to have dinner with us. I was surprised Phil would bother, we haven’t kept in touch lately. He shows up on Facebook once or twice a year, sends a Christmas card (signature only) and stated he isn’t into distant-friendships. However, Somara met him at Jose’s wedding, thought Phil was cool and celebrating the 25th anniversary of attending Marquette was a facet to my vacation. Seeing him would be a positive thing.
While eating pizza, Phil made me regret considering such a thought. I have my faults but I have strived to grow, be a better person. I owe much of it mainly to my doctor, Sonia, Lester and Somara. Phil? He has some petty tendency to bring up old somewhat antagonizing matters as a knee-jerk defense. From what? I wish I knew. Helen has her theories (we discussed them); reluctantly I agree and I will defer to her, she does have a Psych degree. I tried not to take the bait since all of us fellow classmates (Jose, Helen and Paul) could remind Phil about some of his incredibly moronic statements and actions from 1988-91. Trust me, there’s an anecdote I lived through which leaves people on the verge of wetting their pants, it’s that funny. When I hit my limit, I brought up his ignorant GOP-provided talking point about reforming US healthcare. I don’t want ours to become like France’s. Really, you mean the system numerous surveys have ranked number one while the US is in the mid twenties?
Phil and Steve circa 2011
Overall, I do wish Phil well and thank him for the visit. Maybe next time, some ground rules or a moderator should be present. I don’t need a fact-checker, I have enough witnesses to back the Real Chili-Fists of Death matter.
I slept pretty well on the living room couch. Too bad my house is too small for such furniture. Tuesday morning was interesting as I received my 7 AM wake-up call from this creature’s wet nose…
Good morning! Did you order a wet nose in the face?
Tuesday evening was Cub Scout night for Nicolas, Lucas and Tammy (she’s the den mom). This prompted the rest of us to hit the movies. I was hoping for The Muppets. No dice. The choices were Chipwrecked or Tin Tin. Nelson used the veto power of being the dad over the former but I told Ariana I would make it up to her when the Christmas shopping segment of my trip happened.
Next up…part two, Milwaukee and the Stern Pinball factory, not necessarily in any order.