The only person who should try to pull this off would be Jairo, the Brazilian Capoeira teacher from Bob’s Burgers. Even then I think the bear is too formidable for his trademark pony tail whip attack.
If you still believe you need to stand your ground like an idiot, then may I recommend you find smarter lessons in the latest issues of Shirtless Bear-Fighter 2. It’s a hilarious, absurd comic from Image about the angriest man in the world saving us from the War on Bearor! Very glad it returned for a second run of new adventures!