Interstellar: Rental at Best

interstellar

The defending mantra I’ve heard from Interstellar‘s fans have been, “it’s just a movie.” It sure was, a movie with a mediocre plot and terrible science pushing it through. I’m in the same camp as Dr. Plait, I can accept a film when its science is dead wrong (Star Wars, Star Trek II, 28 Days Later, Rise of the Planet of the Apes and Sunshine are on my short list) thanks to it having a strong story/execution. The Nolans’ crap science reeks of being their means to escape the corner their plot put them in. A common tactic used by Tim Burton and Serenity.

You’ve seen the trailers. In the near future, we’re screwed. The human race is headed toward gradual extinction through crop blights, dust storms and general stupidity remaining in charge. I guess the recent US midterm election will guarantee this outcome. Enter Cooper, a former astronaut/pilot/engineer who gets recruited to lead an expedition through a wormhole near Saturn. Somewhere on the other side will be a habitable new world for the human race to ruin! The choices turn out to be pretty lousy if you see which candidates are in the running.

Alamo Extras: The opening to The Right Stuff which was all I remembered. I think we arrived under the wire.

Thus ends the spoiler-free part.

I think the following sentence describes Interstellar the fastest and best. It begins as Idiocracy, tries to transform into 2001/2010 and cops out into Contact and The Black Hole. Lastly, I love Astronomy too much to except this movie as entertaining. My first problem; why the hell would we choose planets orbiting a black hole? Even if it were “stable,” and I’ve read the excuse of it being a non-spinning one, colonists would die from the radiation bursts they can emit. Also, where the hell was the daylight coming from when they were exploring the surfaces? Next oddity, I thought time “speeds up” when you’re on a planet due to its gravity bending time. The astronauts are aging slower than the people stuck on earth during the journey yet it reverses after the first planet is a bust. I have a bone to pick about the fifth dimension too. I was taught it’s probability not gravity. Unless someone with a strong education in Physics or Astrophysics can clarify, please help me out. The biggest error was Cooper falling through the black hole. Time would’ve stretched for him and his death was inevitable due to spaghettification as the powerful gravity pulled him apart and into an incredibly thin strand.

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