Freezageddon ’22!

It’s that time again in Austin/Central Texas! The stores will be depleted of bottled water (the preferred brand in the city is Topo Chico), white bread, milk and toilet paper in fear of the temperature getting well below freezing, we’re talking -10° C. Thankfully, snow is not part of the forecast as yet another Arctic Front or Polar Vortex visits the South. The biggest concern will be if the voluntary (translation, corporations did nothing again courtesy of shit bag governor Abbott and his inept crew) precautions hold. The genius of putting the founder Buc-ee’s truck stops in charge of ERCOT (the people overseeing the Texas grid) is confounding. Southerners, Rednecks, Libertarians and their ilk will never learn, people who excel at business are sociopaths and are frequently shitty at government work.

My biggest concern isn’t me and our house. It will be the millions who don’t have the means to get through this for a couple days. Austin’s homeless population has balloon’d due to Tech Bros, Californicators and East Coast Hipsters moving in. The only upside of the Fed jacking the rates and creating a very self-inflicted recession is how these assholes will have to pay more for buying up houses. The people across the street who only lived in theirs for a few months are not going to see a sudden sale.

Anyway, the Republicans probably have a betting pool on what the death toll is given how poor people they hate are more often Democratic/Socialist voters. Good thing people have guns, given how they’re tools, you can shoot a tree for firewood, blow a hole in a wall to make a fireplace and if those things fail, kill someone else, cut them open and stay inside their warm corpse a la Luke Skywalker and the tauntaun.

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